Leaving a company and starting afresh is quite often like a divorce. You realise that people can become petty about the smallest of things, who gets what desk or who takes what when you separate a company.

Most famously Woz, co-founder of Apple, found out the hard way that Steve Jobs had abused his trust. From my recollection, Jobs was working on a project and needed help to reach a certain deadline. Jobs wasn’t honest about the incentive and money that he would receive from the project, and instead told Woz that he would split the fee with him, a lot less than what Jobs would receive.

Woz worked with Jobs day and night to make sure the project was done, and it was only a few years later that Woz actually found out that Jobs had seriously undercut him in the money he made. Woz was devastated. Not for the fact that Woz received several thousands less than Jobs, but for the mere fact they were friends, and if Jobs had asked him, he would have done the work for free.

People cannot always be trusted, and unfortunately I have also learned the hard way, that sometimes the people you trust the most, can take advantage of your trust and leave you feeling as Woz did… Devastated.

Well this shouldn’t really be a secret, but sometimes people don’t realise how easy it can be to be happy. In the way that you two people can look at the same thing, but one can see it in a completely different way, and be able to turn their perspective to their advantage.

My first example would be the way that you may see “a frustration” in your life. Some examples:

·        I am frustrated with my job and don’t feel like I am going anywhere…

·        I am frustrated with not being able to spend time with people I care about…

·        I am frustrated with having terrible balance and falling over all the time….

Let’s dissect these… firstly, if you consider happiness as “progress”, you can only achieve happiness if you are moving forward in your life. If you are in a job where you have reached a dead end, you will not be progressing, therefore you will be unhappy.

If you are unhappy you are more prone to illness, fatigue, lack of motivation and low energy levels. I have been in this position before and I had two options:

1 – Get stuck in a rut, complain to people about being unhappy and do nothing. Sometimes this can feel the safest options, as change can be considered a risk, and a risk could lead to… terrible things? But what is the worst that could happen?

2 – Follow my dream, consider where I may be able to add the most value in the world, and follow my passion. If you are passionate what you do, you no longer need to “work” another day in your life. But it is not as easy as just saying “Find your passion and follow it.”… most people will reply with “But I don’t know what I want to do” or “I would love to be an astronaut…”.

If you don’t know what you want to do in life, then the best advice is… Go and live, go and experience, go and explore… and if your response is “I don’t have the money to do that”, then consider how you could enhance your experiences with no or little money. There are many books out there by people who have done exactly that!

If they can do it, what is stopping you?

If you then consider happiness to be linked with lack of worry, you can look at the next point. If you “don’t have the time” to spend with people you care about, then maybe you need to consider what actions you can take. Inaction makes people worry. If you are lying in bed worrying about something in your life, a quick solution would be to make a small step towards taking action against this worry. The moment you start taking action, you have started to eliminate the problem (maybe small steps at a time), but this in turn will reduce how much you would worry.

Now with the last point, we can consider happiness to be linked with perception. If you perceive something as a negative, then it will be just that, a negative, a hindrance, something that will weigh you down. But if you consider it another way, if you can consider this ‘adversity’ as a challenge, as an opportunity to learn, as an opportunity to enhance your skill-set. Then maybe, just maybe you can become a ‘Master over your weakness’. If you become a master, then it is no longer a weakness, it is a strength, and I’m pretty sure you can have some fun with this along the way. The balance example above probably seems a bit out of context, but hear me out with this one. Let’s consider the different types of balance exercises you can practice, such as standing on one leg with your eyes closed and trying to keep your balance. When you first try this, you probably will find it difficult to even last more than twenty seconds. The trick when you start is to use your other foot to tap-out your imbalances. The more you practice, the more focused your balance will be. Balance is one of the most important things that people forget to train, until sometimes it’s too late. If you practice something enough, you can then become a master… Now can you see the relevance?